Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Heartache or heartfelt

Are you heartbroken, lonely or do you feel dejected? Do you feel unloved or unappreciated? Does it seem like everyone is against you?

There have been times when my heart felt empty like a deflated balloon, depleted from what it needed most. I have complained that people have taken from me until I had nothing left to give. But it was I who was in control and had the power to say no but did not or maybe did but allowed myself to be sucked back in.

I have prayed for God to intervene in relationships; to make someone love me, to help me end a relationship that was not right for me, and for someone to appreciate me. I have prayed for someone to leave me alone, to include me, to pay attention to me, and to pay me no mind. But I have found that just like God gives us the freedom to choose him or to not choose him, to live for him or to not live for him; he gives everyone the freedom to treat others good or bad.

I have gone to God in tears because I was in despair. I have prayed for God to change someone's heart towards me, for a kind word of encouragement, a little of their time, or to be treated with love and respect instead of disdain. The fact is that God does not control Jim, Jill or Jenny anymore than he does me.

I have the freedom to treat people how I want to and so do you and so does everyone else. There is nothing wrong with praying for God to change someone's heart. Pray for God's will to be done in someone's heart and life. And there is nothing wrong with having a need or needing to be healed emotionally. But it is beneficial to us that we learn to love and give love without expecting anything in return. Our fulfillment and completeness comes from having a close relationship with our heavenly father. It is not serendipitous that we find what we need from someone or somewhere other than where we are looking. Or that sometimes what we need shows up when we least expect it. God wants to give us our hearts desire but he will not force someone to give us what we need or want.

There have been so many times when a kind word from a stranger, or a hug from a little child, or a pleasant conversation that distracted me from my thoughts just totally and completely filled me up and made me forget that I was sad. I am a firm believer that sometimes God uses people to answer our prayers but God can not use just anyone.

The people that God uses have certain characteristics. They are loving, kind and thoughtful. They have a need to help others and are empathetic, understanding human needs and the human heart. Does that sound familiar? Does that sound like you?

I have heard people say how fulfilling it is to help others by offering their time to a good cause. Perhaps when we busy ourselves with someone else's needs we stop looking for someone to fill our needs. When we busy ourselves by helping other's we stop concentrating on oneself. I believe that when we get our head out of the pot of scorched beans we lift our eyes and see what else is available to us and then God can bless us and fill us up.

The person, or relationship or material thing that we are stressing over does not have any power to make us feel one way or the other. We give power to circumstances or to people to hurt us or throw us for a loop by concentrating all of our time and energy on what is wrong in that particular situation instead of concentrating on what is right in the world or what we can do to make a positive difference. Do not fret over what if. State what is and accept it. Then find a way to help others.Give your heart totally and completely to God and give him all of your worries and cares. Allow God to meet your needs. I guarantee that when you learn to do this you will find peace beyond all understanding, inner joy and fulfillment, and faith that leads to small miracles.

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report, if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Those things, which ye have both learned and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you. Philippians 4:8

Written by Lisa Collier Clewis 12/22/2015
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